I find myself going to the refrigerator over and over again hoping that the next time I open it I will find the perfect snack to curb my cravings. I guess I'm hoping for a perfectly delicious feast complete with mouth watering flavor, an appealing display to grab my tastebud attention through my eyes and of course it would be soundly nutritious to lead my body to my ideal fitness level. I sometimes move things around hoping that this magical meal is hiding in one of the drawers or behind a block of cheese.
That is never what I find. The contents always look the same. Vegetables and greens in the drawers waiting to be cleaned and cut. Eggs and meats needing cooking time and usually a recipe to go along with them. A variety of dairy (milk, yogurt, cheeses) tempting me from the top shelf but seeming incomplete and needing some kind of preparation to turn them into a meal.
It's just more work than I want to put out. I just want to eat.
And to feel satisfied.
I had been breezing through some scriptures that I used in a talk a couple of months back when once again I wandered my way to the refrigerator. I was feeling a little discouraged because my 5 minute tip toe through the scriptures had not resulted in an awe inspiring moment of clarity and instruction for my never ending list of pleadings . . endurance, patience, motherly guidance, self acceptance . . the list goes on. When things don't work out the way I want them to I tend to eat. And once again I found myself staring into the refrigerator.
There, I found my answer. Not in the scriptures but in the refrigerator!
It was very clear to me that everything I needed to make a tasty, healthy and satisfying snack was in there. I just had to take the time to pull it out, prepare it, and enjoy it. It was my own laziness holding me back from tummy satisfaction.
And it was also very clear to me that I have been doing the same with the scriptures, wishing that the perfect answers to my nagging questions would magically appear in bold, italic lettering during my 2 minute stare-off with the pages. I go to them frequently only gazing into them with a blank, lazy peek not wanting to put forth the real effort to find the encouraging, uplifting and guiding feast that I know, from past experience, is in there.
So I once again returned to my scriptures. I still didn't have much time to give to them knowing that motherhood would be calling at any moment, but I was willing to really see and soak in the words and meanings in the pages that I went to. I was immediately led to a scripture, once again from the talk that I had prepared, and felt this time an outpouring of love, a promise of help and as a result a desire to be better committed to feasting on the words of Christ. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jacob 3:1-2
Look unto God with firmness of mind, and pray unto him with exceeding faith, and he will console you in your afflictions, and he will plead your cause . . . lift up your heads and receive the pleasing word of God, and feast upon his love; for ye may, if your minds are firm, forever.
What I must do:
*Look to God
*Pray
*Lift up my head (quit the pity party)
*Go to the scriptures
What I may receive:
*Comfort in afflictions
*Feast upon His Love
The footnote for "if your minds are firm forever" led me to Alma 57:27: "and their minds are firm, and they do put their trust in God continually". Also Alma 37:5: "that as much as ye shall put your trust in God even so much ye shall be delivered out of your trials, and your troubles, and your afflictions, and ye shall be lifted up at the last day".
The phrase "comfort in afflictions" reminded me of the teachings of Alma on the atonement in Alma 7:11: "he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind". Suggesting to me that the Atonement will offer me comfort in my afflictions of self doubt and inadequacy among the other modern day struggles that I sometimes feel as an overwhelming weight that I cannot lift. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So here I sit during the final hours of 2008 avoiding the nagging expectation to set a few goals for 2009. All nagging thoughts put aside, I willingly set just two:
1) trust in God and search more frequently and earnestly in the scriptures
2) quit the refrigerator laziness and make that healthy snack
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10 comments:
That's some good gospel learning!...but what the heck was the snack...you know I take food VERY seriously!
thank you!! I appreciate your insight and simple lesson...I hope to do the same!
Kimberly I do exactly the same thing...I really appreciated your post tonight.
OHHHH... Btw Your Family Picture is AMAZING!!!!!! I love it !!!
thanks Kim it was just whant I needed. and im glad I'm not the only one who looks at the fridge time and time agian thinking something new will be there since i last looked
Wow. You never cease to amaze me. i find it amazing that you can look at an everyday situation and find a gospel lesson in it. Kimberly you are my hero! btw, i just recently found your blog and i am so in love with it!
Would you please write a book? You put things in such simple, meaninful order that I not only understand it but also relate to it. I love that you don't just start out with the scriptures and tell why they were meaningful and helpful to you but you explain the process on how you found the scriptures and "liken it to yourself". I wouldn't have ever thought of comparing looking for a snack to the scriptures but I'm amazed at how I've been doing it too. The scriptures truly are amazing but we have to "feast upon the words of Christ" to feel satisfied. I heard a talk once about "feasting" - how it is like a Thanksgiving dinner and not a snack. Your post made me think of that talk. You are starting to feast. I wish you luck in your goals for 2009. I think you will do awesome.
Really...what was the snack?
Kimberly, WOW!
This is a really nice post.
Oscar and I had a great conversation about it.
I just had to come back to read this post again! You truly are so Amazing Kimberly....Thank You!
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