Being the Mom

During the past couple of weeks I have started to feel guilty for not being a better mom. It was only intensified last night at book group as I listened to the other mothers tell some of the things they do with their kids (a tangent discussion that really did have to do with the book/literature). Don't get me wrong, I love bookgroup. It was my own insecurities that were sparking the guilt.

Here's what I hear/see. Mom's who:

* take their kids to the park
* sign them up for swimming lessons
* read to their kids (not just Dr. Suess but moral of the story/history literature)
* play games with them
* make cookies for all the neighborhood kids that have congregated in their yard
* make/provide Halloween costumes (yes, that topic has already come up)

I have to admit that I have felt a little inadequate, lazy and lame as a mommy. I had already been feeling this way when I went to Mom's house last week and was trying to remember a quote that I had put on a pillow case for her. I took a picture of it while I was there, came home and continued to feel even more inadequate.

This morning I woke up with a better perception of myself and no longer feel guilty. I realized that my kids are fed, dressed, have a bed and home to sleep in. As far as all that activity stuff goes, I'm great at planning it but my follow through to actually carry out the activity is lacking bigtime. However, I enjoy just being with (a.k.a. hanging out) with my kids and we laugh A LOT!

Though it is not a daily or even weekly occurance, I have been known to take them to the park, read to them (though the book needs to have lots of pictures or be the Book of Mormon), played games with them and 1 year I did make their Halloween costumes. I don't like making cookies but I'm good at providing unlimited popcorn and Otter Pops.

I'm doing the best I can. No more guilt for me . . . until the next insecure moment.

Owie!

Nathan's little head has taken quite a beating lately.

He was attacked by a bush at Grandma's house which left the long scratch down his face.

We spent 4 days at Grandma's house and he mastered the ladder, not falling once. However, as we were leaving he tried to climb into the Yukon by himself and fell onto the rocks in the driveway which quickly swelled and turned purple leaving two scabby bumps on his left temple.

Then he was riding his tractor in the driveway and went off the edge which toppled him over the front of it and left roadrash on his forehead and skid marks on his nose.

The bump that isn't visible is the one on the back of his head that he got as he stood on the banana chair and pushed it backward smacking the back of his head into the corner of the end table by the couch.

Parade of Homes

Exactly one week ago I walked out my front door turning everything in our house, including the house, over to the builders. They made me feel really good about our home when they had decorators come in to make it all presentable for the show and all they ended up doing was hanging 4 paintings, hanging new towels in the bathrooms and adding 6 fake trees/plants around the house. They had originally talked about bringing in furniture, bedding and kitchen stuff. when the 'professional' decorator looked at the kitchen he said "your decorating is phenomenal, we won't change a thing". That made me feel great and he would probably be surprised to know that everything came from either DI, 50% off coupons or clearance sales.

The homeshow was very successful for our builder. The awards don't really have much to do with us but are a reflection of the builder and he did great. Our home, and builder, won:

Best Kitchen
Best Exterior
Best Floorplan
Best Technology

I wasn't too surprised about the kitchen - that was what the builder was working for all along. After looking at a couple of the other homes our kitchen definitely had more room than any of the others and I personally liked the design best.

The Best Exterior award really shocks me because the other houses in the homeshow were all done in the newest styles (dark colors, stucco, pillars, dormer windows) and ours is just a typical country style with siding and rock. Nothing spectacular or in 'keeping up with the Jones' style - just like we like it.

Best Technology really goes to LeRoy, not the builder, because LeRoy designed and installed all of it. Personally, I think he went a little overboard but he sure had a good time wiring his own house. The extra's that he put in were dimmers in all bedrooms, a full intercom system with music features in each bedroom/upstairs/downstairs/office, surround sound for the downstairs 'great' room and wiring for a wall mount flat screen tv.

Best Floorplan actually goes to . . . me. Silly actually. A couple of women asked the builder and the architect if they could have them do the same house and the architect had to contact us to get permission because I was the one who cut, pasted and rearranged 4 different floorplans together and came up with my own. It looks like we might even get paid for it.

When we got home Saturday night (around 10:45pm) we got the kids all put to bed, left everything in the Yukon and hung 2 pictures. It was kind of a 'marking our territory' effort to make the house seem a little ours. We have had trouble feeling like we have been living in someone else's house. Now, after only 4 days of being home without the homeshow looming in our future, we seem to be settling in rather comfortably.

I can't believe it is all (finally) over and we are on to the next summer activities.

FHE Fire

For FHE tonight I used the Mormonad from the April 2008 New Era. Only LeRoy and I elaborated on it a little more and made an object lesson out of it. We actually started a fire in the back yard with a propane torch representing the things that heat up an argument or take away from the positive spirit in our home and the water hose representing the cooling down process or keeping the spirit. We actually burned a picture of our new house to try and leave an impression with each of us that we are destroying the spirit in our home when we argue, call each other names, etc.

We also used the Mormonad from May 2008 and a scripture in Ephesians: "Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you. And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another and grieve not the Holy Spirit of God."

Then we had another framed picture of our house and talked about apologizing and forgiving.

Rather than putting our fire out with the hose we just talked about it and then roasted marshmallows for dessert. Nathan didn't like the stickiness but he sure liked watching Derek burn them to a black crisp treat.

The kids also loved it that we let them take over the fire and hang out for about an hour after FHE, serenaded by the crickets and frogs. Levi was enjoying it until he was bit by a red ant . . . on his belly. He jumped around trying to get the ant off of him, ended up burning the 'sucker' in the fire and danced around squealing that it was burning him. The bite immediately went red but after about an hour he was ok, except for the fact that every little itch on his body made him think he was being attacked by ants. Nothing like living in the country!

Turtle Bike Ride

I hit an ambitious moment Sunday afternoon and went on a bike ride. Due to the fact that the seat on my bike has been lowered to accomodate the short Justin legs that ride it, my knees were killing me after only about 10 minutes. Not to mention the fact that my seat end has not been on a bike in probably a year and wasn't handling it well. So I turned around, headed home and found this only a short distance from our house:

He was quickly trying to cross the street when I happened upon him, literally. I almost ran over him with my bike.

The kids were thrilled, begging to keep him. Nathan's reaction was to go nose to nose with the turtle, pretend to bite him and say "yummy breakfast". I don't know where he got that! I have never served turtle for breakfast.

Kids

This morning Erika was very helpful getting the house ready to turn over to the decorators; dusting, cleaning her room to a spectacular un-Erika like state, cleaning the mudroom, taking out garbage and cleaning the upstairs bathroom. She also got all of her stuff packed for girlscamp and was cheerful doing all of it. So when she asked if she could go to Ali's to paint the ceiling I willingly said yes (though keeping her busy would have been even more helpful but I didn't want to push my luck.)

At Ali's house they are painting part of the basement that was unfinished. When they showed up at our house a couple of hours later this is what walked through the door. Seriously girls, did you get any on the ceiling??

The boys (Derek and Justin) have been a completely different story. By 3:00 I was ready to blow my top after spending the day doing stupid jobs that I normally ignore but that have to be done before the homeshow. All they had accomplished was cleaning their bedroom and they proudly came upstairs gloating that it was done . . . 5 hours after they started!!!! I had assumed (yes, we see what that made me) that they were doing all that was on the list; the bathroom, family room downstairs and dusted. When I went to check it I nearly bit a hole in my tongue not yelling out "my #$%^&# boys, what in the #$%^& have you been doing!!". Instead I reminded them of the job list, walked upstairs to the medicine cabinet and took pills. Herbs actually, but whatever, I should have taken them this morning!

I think the boys could tell that I was holding my breath and pretty much doing all I could not to yell so they managed to get the rest of the jobs done in 1/2 hour. Was that really so hard?!!!?!?!? Why can't the job be done without mom turning into a volcano on the verge of erupting before they do what they are asked??

Now I am finished cleaning my house. If the decorators see something that needs to be done (like mopping the kitchen floor) they can do it themselves. I'm so tired of caring about this homeshow and just want to live in our house without the worry of impressing every Tom, Dick and Harry (or Sally, Judy, Betty) that comes to the door. My latest quote that I love and really do want to live by is from "Yours, Mine and Ours":

"a home should be for free expression, not for public impression."

On another note: My Arms Are Still Burning!

Grass!

Our family spent about 8 hours in the sun yesterday laying down sod and working on the yard. The 83 degree weather was perfect . . . for major sunburns and heat stroke . . . and for the yard work.

The difference that grass makes is like putting carpet in a home. Now it is starting to really look like a yard. Bushes also made it look so much homier and better. However, laying sod is HARD work. Mostly just heavy work, lots of lifting and pounding.

Last night Derek started throwing up and most of us noticed our sunburns. I couldn't sleep well because of a throbbing headache throughout my entire head and I couldn't find a comfortable position that didn't cause pain on my lobster red arms. This morning I feel very dizzy, still have the throbbing headache, have heat coming off of my arms like an oven and that is just me.

At least Hryum has no side effects from yesterdays work. He slept in the house in his swing most of the day. Nathan just has the tips of his ears burned. Each of the other kids has some kind of burn or headache and LeRoy is just tan. Of course he has a terrible back ache from all the lifting.

The lesson: sunscreen needs to be applied more than once for an 8 hour job in the sun (or for some should have been applied in the first place), we should have been drinking more water throughout the day, and hats would probably have helped.

Homeshow Preview

I got a call this morning at 8am telling me that the mayor and city/chamber members will be walking through our house at 8am tomorrow! So then I went on the website to see if they have put up a picture of our house and this is what I found . . .

That is my house and I wish that's what the landscaping looked like. The guys are just now putting in the sprinkler system and we have piles and piles and piles of sod on the driveway - all free sod from the elementary school that is expanding the playground.

I wish I could see the circular part of the landscaping so that I knew how to make it look. I'm not very good at the imagining up part.

Derek & Justin who??

Do I really have 6 kids? Some days I feel like I only have 4. Derek and Justin are always at the Anderson's house. They are the family that had us over for FHE the first week we were here and they have 5 boys, no girls. The mom is like the perfect, cheerful, happy to make cookies and play games all day stay home mom - kinda like the one I used to dream of being.

So with baseball for Derek, scouts for Justin and time spent at the Anderson's and outside . . . I really don't get to take too many pictures of these two.

But they are still mine and they do sleep at our house.

Here is a little adventure they had playing in the irrigation ditch by our house when we actually had a couple of warm days.

The Hat Hottie

Erika is suddenly into hats. She also is doing this "Charlie's Angels" pose thing as she sneaks around every corner, door and room in the house. We are constantly seeing her sneak around with her 'gun' saying "pop, pop" as she protects us from all the imaginary bad guys that Nathan tells her are there.