Surgical Comedy

Here we are again. This is now the third back surgery in 18 months. I could look at this situation and panic but instead I'm choosing to laugh. Not that it's really funny but if I don't find the humor in it, I'd probably bust out in what-now hysteria . . . and I'm not even the one dealing with constant pain and medical procedures. So, here's to the funny parts of LeRoy and surgery.

Originally, we were supposed to be at the hospital at 8:30am and we were. At 9:00 they sent us home (after admitting) because the doctor had been called in to an emergency in Idaho Falls. We were told everything was on hold until noon, come back at 11:30. Then we got a call to come in at 10:00, it wasn't quite the emergency they thought, surgery would be at 10:30. We rushed back up there, sliding half the way because the roads were so slick, and they quickly got LeRoy changed, the IV going and the drugs were in at exactly 10:45. Another nurse comes walking in and I recognized the look on the woman's face. She was trying so hard not to roll her eyes as she told us that the doctor had not left Idaho Falls yet but he should be here any time . . . after a 35 minute drive . . . probably 45 with the road conditions. The doctor finally showed up at 11:50 and surgery started at 12:15. So, LeRoy spent an extra hour and a half doped up on all those happy drugs at the Madison Surgical Circus while I sat there listening to the on-goings of Madison Day Surgery in boredom. I ate a small box of Milk Duds before surgery even began.

Now let's back up a little to the really fun part. As the nurse started putting the happy drugs in the IV she asked him questions. She told us that he should drift off pretty quick but we know from past experience that LeRoy talks and talks and talks through the drugs clear up to the minute the anesthesiologist conks him out with the big stuff. And it's funny!

The nurse asked him, "what does the G before LeRoy stand for".

He responded "Graford" only the way that LeRoy says it with his southern twang is "Gray (staccato pause) Ferd" and he was slurring like a drunk.

"Grapefruit?" the nurse asked in disbelief for clarification.

"Yeah, Grape Fruit!" he emphasized, not only once but three times.

After the first time he said it I smiled and shook my head "no" to the nurse and after she grinned back she just kept asking him. Gradually, he bumbled off to a dreamless, painless state of drug-hood with outbursts of nonsense and mumblings about electrical stuff.

Now, in his defense, he did say his name right the first time and it was only after she put "grapefruit" in his medicated mind that he kept demanding that his name was grapefruit each time she questioned him but still, this would have made a great YouTube video.

He doesn't remember any of it. Erika now calls him Grapefruit instead of Dad.

LeRoy on drugs.
He doesn't remember this either.

Recovery is slow. Because of his medical history and current degenerating discs he has been told to find another profession and at the very least not work for six months. There's got to be humor in there somewhere.

If all else fails, we can always depend on Derek for smiles and laughs. These are a few of the pictures he took of himself.


Derek not on drugs

Snow Sculpting

The snow that we have shoveled off of the driveway has created quite a tall wall and the boys have a hard time climbing over it to get to the yard to play. So Derek, my builder, made steps to get over the snow.



Being a crafty person myself I understand the satisfaction he gets from creating something so I wasn't overly surprised when he headed out to "build a pyramid". The steps were just an experiment, the pyramid was to be art.



Then he wanted to try something besides just squared off shapes so decided to do a car. As he carved the details in (all that time watching Ace of Cakes was his training) I scavenged through the cupboard looking for an empty spray bottle, or at least one that I didn't want back, to put food coloring and water in to add a little color to his car. Mostly, I wanted to be able to see it in pictures. I dumped out half a bottle of Windex, mixed a little blue (his color choice) and after a hand cramp from all that spraying he had a blue "Italian Job car". He like the coloring so much that he sprayed the pyramid as well.

Reading Time

I've made myself have a some reading time in the evenings to wind down a little. (That makes me sound like I'm uptight or stressed or something . . . hmmm). One night I hid from my family a little earlier than usual and ended up with company.


Harrison sauntered in first. He tried to nuzzle up under my neck but I felt like I was suffocating in a furry scarf and I had to hold my book clear up above my face so I moved him down a little. He weighs quite a bit and is long enough to cover my entire torso but I didn't want to push him off because his purr is very calming and he is so warm (I have not been able to get warm this winter!)


Derek came in to ask a question, laughed, grabbed the camera off my dresser and took a couple of pictures.

The little boys were not far behind their Pied Piper Derek and reading time was officially over. They fought over who got to lay by mom so to keep the peace Derek offered to take pictures of all of us on my bed.



Hyrum and I made the faces we were told to but Nathan seemed a little to interested in looking at himself on the flipped out LCD screen.

Farewell 2010

It was just us. Together. Eating, playing, laughing.



The boys chose crepes and ebelskivers for dinner and then volunteered to make them. With an offer like that I can overlook the lack of nutritional value those intense carbs and sugars hold, at least for a party night. I added hibachi chicken and pineapple skewers to the menu to provide at least a little protein in an attempt to balance the blood sugar. (It didn't work, video to follow). After the little boys went to bed we also roasted marshmallows over the gel burner that we borrowed from LeRoy's 72 hour kit and we made s'mores. The blood sugar was a gonner at this point.


MmMmMmMmMm!
Ebelskivers: apple spice, banana carmel, egg and cheese. Crepes: raspberry, apricot. Hibachi chicken and pineapple skewers. Chocolate milk.

We set up a game tournament and though we had all of the games sitting out, the card games were the chosen ones. After each round or hand the winner would get a point and a single treat (Rolo or Starburst). The person with the most points at the end of the night would get the final prize of a Jamba gift card and a Jamba water bottle. I was concerned that the gift might have been a little lame for the boys but their competitive attitudes showed otherwise. When I explained the set up and the prizes LeRoy teased me that I was trying to sneak a Bunco night in (since I have missed 3 months in a row!) but there were no dice involved so I am obviosly innocent.



Nathan and Hyrum provided plenty of entertainment while playing Aye! Aye! Nephi. Nathan caught on rather quickly and actually won 2 games but Hyrum thought that when he was told to discard that he could pick any card on the table to put in the pile. The more we laughed the sillier he got and then he won. Never underestimate the poker face of toddlers! We couldn't get him to quit yelling "Aye! Aye! Heephi" which could have been brought on by an overdose of sugar, the thrill of the game, and his inner comedian.

LeRoy played while the little boys were up but had to go sit in his recliner after we put them to bed around 8:30. Standing at the table for games and leaning over for each turn was almost as painful as actually sitting there so he lasted as long as he could and retired to his sports den. The timing worked out really well though because Erika got home from work just as LeRoy pulled out. And then the real insanity began.

After rounds of Aye! Aye! Nephi, Wackee Six, Racko, Garbage, Blink, Uno and 4 hours of gaming (drum roll please) . . .



Derek won the Jamba prize . . . and a date with me since I am his ride to cash in that gift card.

Around 11:30 we finished our tournament and had a little lull time. You know, that weird silence that comes after one activity is finished and you're not quite ready for the next one. Well, Erika decided that we each needed to find our natural laugh. To do this (according to Erika) you lay on the floor on your back with your arms folded over your chest in an X. You take a deep breath in and another person pushes down on your arms forcing the air out and Voila! you get to hear your natural laugh. Not only did we hear our natural laughs but we laughed until we were crying and our sides and faces hurt. It was the perfect way to ring in the new year!



LeRoy played the part of responsible adult when he headed to bed shortly after midnight but in a complete sugar rush I stayed up until almost 3 am with my teenagers watching Psych episodes through Netflix instant play. Even though I was still wide awake I knew that I would be the one getting up in the morning a few hours later with the little boys so I went to bed and was up again at 7 am. I felt torn between two time zones as my little boys were gearing up for the new day and my older kids were heading to bed. Nathan thought we should pick up game playing where he left off the night before so I snuggled in my blanket in front of the fireplace and half played half slept through Buzz Light Year Uno with Nathan and Hyrum.

Another Year Done

Dear Mr. Sun

I miss you.

I miss the light you bring to my life.
I miss seeing the sky and birds outlined by your glow.
I miss your warmth on my skin and hair. Grilling on the frozen deck is not enjoyable.
I miss waking up to your rays beaming through my window calling me for a new day.

I miss watching the kids run around drenched in your balmy heat.

I miss the color that only comes when you are shining.
I even miss your bright glare in my eyes.
Please come back. Soon

P.S. Attached is a picture of the kids eating cereal for dinner during one of our last warm days together. It was such a happy, beautiful day that you provided. I remember not wanting to lose my time with you, knowing that it was coming to an end for a few months, by baking in the kitchen and I couldn't refuse the boys requests to eat outside with you. Wasn't that a fun day? I can't wait to have days like those again.

Family Pictures 2010

It is only December 23rd and I have EVERYTHING DONE for Christmas. I don't think I have ever said that in my whole life! Well, the housework isn't done but come on, it would be undone as soon as I finish so I'll let it go for a few more days.

The key to my survival over the past few months has been to simplify and do only what feels 100% needful. So, to all of my neighbors who didn't get a clever gift; to my wonderful circle of friends that I haven't seen in a few months; to my extended family that won't get a Christmas card/picture/letter this year; to those who have sent personal e-mails asking for a blog post to know what is going on in our lives . . . I still love you and we're still here (just a little less public).


I did want to share a family Christmas card like in years past but I'm settling for the backup plan (since this method can be done between 11pm and 6am without any offspring interruptions and it doesn't need to be picked up, addressed, stamped or put out in the mailbox.) Actually, my lack of enthusiasm for getting cards out prompted LeRoy to do it himself, which he did all by himself like a big boy without any secretarial help! For the rest of you who didn't make the 12 count cut, here's the blog version of our Christmas letter.



The Edwards Family 2010

~ 20 years ~



I have BEAUTIFUL children!

Each one of them has a piece of my heart.



I love my teenagers!

Yes, LeRoy is on the teenager page.

Sometimes I want to give them away.
But, I do share some really great, silly, fun times with them.

No, Levi is not engaged. Caytlyn just spent almost 10 months worth of daily visits with us so I count her as one of my own.

Then Levi moved out.

Now I miss both of them.


Playing in "Heavenly Father's yard".

That's what Nathan calls the temple grounds.

It is one of the places that we like to run away to.

We love each other. Everything that has happened this year
(the good, bad, happy, sad, easy, difficult, extremely hard to handle)
has led us to a greater love for one another; sometimes through pure joy and sometimes through forgiveness. Faith, patience, love and tolerance are the attributes that we are growing the most in and with hope as our anchor we have survived and enjoyed 20 years and look forward to 20 more. With Christ as our strength and focus, we want to wish everyone

A Very Merry Christmas!

Surprise Utah Trip

On a whim, LeRoy and I decided to pack up our family and leave town. We didn't tell the kids any of the plans we had and that turned out to be a great way to avoid the "uhh, that sounds boring" reaction. I also wanted to spend the night in a decent hotel (since the one in Vegas was less than stellar, okay, it was laaaame . . . free 2 nights remember, there's a reason it's free) so LeRoy searched around online and we were able to get a Hilton family suite for less than it would have cost for 2 rooms at the Best Western. And let me tell you a stay at the Hilton out shines the Best Western by a galaxy of stars! I think I'm becoming a hotel snob.

Our first stop was in our driveway. Weird, I know, but it really took some creativity to fit 7 of us comfortably in LeRoy's truck (did I mention we sold the Yukon in October?) and we weren't used to the fact that we would need to cover our luggage in the bed of the truck. We ended up laughing at our lack of preparation for this part and by the time we got on the road it felt like we had visited a mini circus but on the road we were.





Our official first vacation stop was at the Hill Air Force Base - Aerospace Museum. Derek was so excited when he realized where we were going that he looked like our neighbors little poodle who shakes with uncontrollable excitement until he piddles. Luckily, Derek didn't piddle but he sure was out of control with excitement. The next 2 hours were full of exclamations from all of us.





Nathan and Hyrum were in heaven (or space) when we found ACE - the Aerospace Center for Education. Basically a hands on, huge playroom. Hyrum wanted to try on every helmet there and once Nathan had his NASA suit on and was sitting in front of a real/mock cockpit he really thought he was going to fly that plane out of the room. They were very patient to have their turns with the kid sized airplanes that they got to pedal around the museum. If we lived closer we'd probably be there once a week. Did I mention the whole thing is FREE?!?!?!




We did not have near enough time at the museum but at closing they kicked us out and we vowed to go back, someday. Even as we were being shoo-ed out of the building the kids were still stopping for pictures and hollering "did you see this", "holy freak, look at those missiles" and much more. It's a good thing they didn't have recruiters there. Derek would have used his height to lie about his age and signed on the spot.

Our next stop was a surprise for Nathan. He is a Narnia fan - or fanatic. He watches either the Lion, Witch and Wardrobe and/or Prince Caspian at least once a week. With the release of The Dawn Treader this week we couldn't imagine not taking him to the theater to see it. We asked the clerk at the museum where the nearest theater was and ended up in Layton. Little did we know that tickets would be $2.50 cheaper there than in Rexburg (Yay!) so LeRoy splurged and let the kids get popcorn. I wish I had a picture of Nathan watching the movie. He was mesmerized. He didn't touch the popcorn and would only lean over to say "there's Lucy, there's Edmund, I love Reepacheep". The movie even kept Hyrum's attention.



Our final adventure of the day was to see the Christmas lights and nativity at Temple Square. Don't get me wrong, it was beautiful. But it was really hard to see the beauty beyond the bazillion people that were there. We made it just in time to hear the nativity story being told with spotlights on the stable, shepherds and manger. Again, very well done but packed with people! Then we walked upstairs to see the Christus statue and Hyrum would not quit staring. As soon as he could see it in full view he reverently whispered "Jesus" before anyone could ask him who it was. I was humbled to see the reverence that Nathan and Hyrum both showed as stood at the figure representing our Savior.

We finally ended up at our hotel and it was a refuge from a packed day of sight seeing. It was practically an apartment with so many amenities that I wondered why I had packed more than the diapers and pajamas. The pool was open 24 hours so LeRoy, Derek and Justin went swimming until 1 am and were at it again (with Nathan and Hyrum) at 9 am clear and they didn't get out until time to check out at 11:00.



We had 3 rooms and 4 beds so we were able to put the little boys in a room sharing a bed and it proved to be quite entertaining. First, they wouldn't stop giggling like little girls until I had them each face a different wall and after about 45 minutes of that they fell asleep sometime around 10:30. Then they provided us with a boxing match all performed while they were asleep. During about a 10 minute period (around 1:30am) they switched positions at least 4 times - each time with someone getting a hand in the face - and the rest of us laughed through the whole thing.

20th Anniversary

We hit the big two-oh!
And I just realized that I have been married for more than half my life!

During the summer we day dreamed about going on a cruise for our 20th anniversary but reality kept us ashore and we settled for Las Vegas. LeRoy was kaboozled into a 90 minute time share presentation that got us a free 3 day hotel stay and $150 cash and he couldn't think of a better place to blow $150 so Las Vegas it was.

Because of an early morning flight we went down to Utah one night early and got a hotel room in Salt Lake. After hearing that we were celebrating our 20th the clerk upgraded our room to a jacuzzi room (also for free) and that proved to be a great start to our 3 day trip. Hey, get your mind out of the gutter! The jacuzzi soak was just what LeRoy's back needed after a 4 hour drive.

Time in Vegas was . . . interesting. To be honest, I don't like Vegas. LeRoy loves it. He likes the excitement of the casinos, the glitter, the hype, the wow factor, the magicians and hypnotists. I like quiet places. I could have gone to the Redwood Forest, not seen one other human and been just as content with calling that a celebration. With that said, I found something in Vegas that I love, love, love. And now that I know the trick to getting around the strip with as little exposure to casinos as possible (always enter the valet entrance) I would go back this weekend just to see it again and again.



We went to see Mystere by Cirque du Soleil. Amazing talent! Breath taking live music! Gorgeous costumes! Unbelievable ab strength! Dynamic tumbling and acrobatics! Wow, wow, wow!! A camera cannot catch it all and after watching a PBS special about it I can honestly say it's worth the price of the ticket to see it live. I'm already saving for the next show. Anyone want to go with me?



LeRoy's favorite part of the whole trip was the David Copperfield Illusionist show. He was invited on stage for one of the tricks and he was blown away. Still is actually. If you ask him for the story he'll tell it with the same enthusiasm as the day he was there. It was a great show with stunts that left us wondering and imagining. Oh, and LeRoy walked up to Regis Philbin and introduced himself like Regis should have known him which he did because LeRoy had made such a Texan impression on the stage. LeRoy was in celebrity heaven. Regis and Copperfield in one day, what more could the guy hope for? Well, pictures maybe. They gave an announcement several times before the show started that there was to be absolutely NO pictures or recordings of anything. As soon as LeRoy was chosen to go on stage I had my phone ready to snap a quick shot assuming that the announcement had some "hey, my husband is up there with Copperfield" clause that would exclude me from corporal camera punishment but suddenly there was this security woman standing right next to my chair (and within my body bubble) making sure that I didn't snap so much as a blur for his on-stage experience. So, you all just have to believe LeRoy's version of the "Goose in the Bucket" story without any visual proof. You can believe him, it was really, really cool.




The place that we both compromised on and enjoyed like little kids was the M&M factory. Four stories of nothing but M&M contraband and you just have to feel young (which we really needed after walking the entire 4 mile strip). The short movie showing how M&M's are made is fun, all that chocolately color just forces you to feel happy and who doesn't want their picture taken with a life size M&M? I wanted to bring Red home with me. Of course, LeRoy would have brought Green home and you can tell from the looks of her and LeRoy's dimpled smile while standing next to her that I would have had jealousy issues. Our goal is to make it another 20 years so we left Red and Green in Vegas.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you, thank you to my momma who took care of all my responsibilities while I was traipsing around Sin City!

Thanksgiving

My favorite memory of Thanksgiving this year is having my boys baking in the kitchen with me. We laughed and snitched in the food and laughed some more and by the time we were finished we had nearly everything made for Thanksgiving day because they just kept asking what more they could do to help. I'm not sure if they wanted to keep going because we were having so much fun or because I was ignoring all the finger dipping going on. Even Hyrum was occupied and content the entire time we were working. He was busy making marshmallow pies (his very own creation) and cutting out leaves for the top of the apple pie.



We had Levi and Caytlyn and 4 missionaries over for Thanksgiving dinner and games. Derek has been teaching himself how to play the guitar so he was our background music during our evening activities. The sister missionaries creamed Elders Hill and Pitt, LeRoy, Justin and Hyrum in a game of Apples to Apples while Caytlyn chugged away with the high score during a very close Train Game with Levi, Nathan and I.




Elder Hill, Sister Hulka, Sister Faucete, Kimberly, LeRoy, Elder Pitt

Lead Me, Guide Me, Walk Beside Me, Help Me Find the Way

As Nathan hugged me goodbye, walked out the front door, climbed in the neighbors car and left for preschool I noticed his footprints in the fresh snow. Only his footprints were there, mine were not. As I turned to go back inside I was a little teary eyed. Wasn't it just a short time ago that he refused to go anywhere without me? He left my arms and went out into the big bad world - okay, so it was within a mile and he was safe at a neighbors house - but I can't see him, guide him, protect him, teach him. He is out there making decisions on his own. My time with each child to lead and guide and walk beside seems so short and suddenly they are off finding the way on their own.

This image displays the full purpose that we put him in preschool. It wasn't for an educational boost because he already exceeds kindergarten expectations but it was strictly for social purposes. It is working. Still, it is hard for me to let go. And so the detachment process begins with another one of my children. Thank goodness it takes years of weaning!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I went in to check on the boys one night and found this:




Nathan was sitting by his nightlight looking at the pictures in the Book of Mormon. I asked him what he was doing and he responded, "I just wanted to learn more about Jesus". How can I send him to bed after a statement like that? As I sat next to him he asked a couple of questions about the pictures and I reminded him of their stories. Then I quietly stepped out, leaving him sitting by the nightlight because he didn't want the overhead light on, and after about 15 minutes he climbed in bed and went to sleep.

Experiences like this leave me humbly and respectfully thanking my children for their example. At times they "lead me, guide me, walk beside me, [and] help me find the way".